Anonymous Bra Causes Massive Friday Afternoon Traffic Delay On Skyland Boulevard!
Are you missing a Bra? If so, chances are that you might have lost it on Skyland Boulevard today!
You see, as I was driving west on Skyland Boulevard at approximately 2pm today, I found myself at a standstill after I had just passed Barkley Cadillac/GMC. I found it odd that traffic was backed up that far back. Usually, you don't get stuck until you hit Walmart. However, when I finally creeped up to 31rst Street East, (where Buddy's and Domino's Pizza are), I finally figured out WHAT was causing this traffic jam......It was an Anonymous Bra laying in the left lane all by itself! Apparently, THIS Lone Bra was causing a Gapers Delay, because after that intersection it was smooth sailing!
As I was stuck at the intersection observing that sleeping Brassiere to the left of me, I also figured out WHY so many people were Rubbernecking at it......because it was a LARGE Bra! (I didn't measure it myself, but my "conservative" guess would have it at a "D", or "DD", size)....it was quite substantial. Then, as the light turned green, I started wondering if there was a Topless Woman running somewhere down Skyland Boulevard!
Since my gas tank was as empty as that Bra laying on Skyland Boulevard, I decided to pull into Buddy's to get some gas. I was careful to go around the Bra and not run over it. (Because I wouldn't flattened it and it wouldn't have been of any use to the owner if she decided to come back and retrieve it).
I began pumping gas, and the guy at the next pump started talking to me. He said, "Hey, did you see that Bra?" I said "Yes". He then said to me, "I'd like to meet the owner of THAT Bra and get her number!"
So, if YOU'RE the owner of THAT Bra, please come back and get it.......because it's causing a bit of a distraction.